19 Polite Ways to Exclude Children at Weddings

Regardless of how you feel about having children at a wedding, you need to be 100% clear on it to your guests. Addressing an invitation to Jack and Sarah and assuming they won’t bring their son, will undoubtedly lead to misunderstandings.

 

Including Children

If you belong firmly in the group that believes the more children, the merrier, then let your guests know. Be prepared! Think about food and the seating arrangements. Are the children old enough to have their own table? Will they need to sit with their parents for the main meal? What activities will be available to keep them occupied? A table with drawing or building materials can go a long way to keeping them quiet during the speeches for example. Perhaps you are able to have hired childcare to entertain them in a separate room or tent. Most children aren’t interested in eating a proper sit-down meal so instead of wasting money on an expensive menu, consider having a child-friendly menu just for them. Is there room for them to run around and let off steam without running between the tables and being a nuisance?

 

You don’t have to invite every child of course. You may wish to only include younger brothers and sisters of the wedding party or just your flower girl and page boy. Make it clear on your invitations who is invited. Name each guest so that there can be no room for misinterpretation. You should also let parents know that ultimately, they are responsible for their children on the day. Let them know what you expect from them.

 

Excluding Children

You may feel quite strongly about not having children at your wedding. But remember, there is no love stronger than the love for a child so be kind. It can be a sensitive issue. Telling your guests there’s no way you want their rugrats at your wedding, isn’t helpful! Below are a few examples of how to say children are not included. Most friends should understand. Be prepared however for the occasional guest who feels it’s either all of them or none. You may have to accept that some guests won’t want to, or be able to, attend.

 

Be honest and tell them up front your reasons for excluding children. Perhaps your particular celebration is inappropriate for children or your venue won’t allow under eighteens. Most people will happily accept your reasons and appreciate that your wishes come first as it is your day. You don’t need to overexplain it. It is your day and your decision after all.

 

Give your guests plenty of time to plan for babysitting if their young children are not invited. Breastfeeding mothers may be unable to attend without their baby for obvious reasons. It’s always good to allow them the opportunity to bring their baby with them. Consider organising a separate room close by where the baby may be able to sleep safely and be checked on regularly. This will enable parents to enjoy the festivities without worrying. Many hotels provide babysitting services and will call the parent as and when needed for feeding or if there are problems.

 

Address your invitations carefully using the names of those invited. You can even put the names in on the RSVP card so that it’s clear or state how many places will be reserved. To avoid any misunderstandings, add a message to the invitation. Here is a selection to give you some ideas:

 

1. While we would love to invite all children, we are unfortunately only able to invite immediate family.

 

2. In order to allow all guests, including parents, an evening of relaxation we have chosen for our wedding day to be an adult-only occasion. We hope this advance notice means you are still able to share our big day and will enjoy having the evening off!

 

3. Children at the ceremony, we'd love them on the scene. Reception time, however, is an adult's only theme.

 

4. To give all our guests the opportunity to let their hair down and have a good time without having to worry about little eyes and ears we politely request no children.

 

5. Making it personal: We’d love to have Lucy and Alex there but unfortunately, we’re limited by budget/space constraints. We hope you can still make it.

 

6. To allow everyone a night of uninhibited fun, we respectfully ask that no children attend the reception.

 

7. Due to budget/space constraints, children are only invited if named on the invitation. Infants under 12 months welcome.

 

8. While we love to watch the children run and play, this is an ‘adults only’ kind of day.

 

9. Our budget and venue cannot accommodate children outside the family. We hope that you will see this as an opportunity to enjoy an adult day, let your hair down and enjoy the party with us!

 

10. Due to the guest number restriction at our venue, we are unable to extend this invitation to your children. We hope that you will see this as an opportunity to enjoy an adult day, let your hair down and enjoy the party with us!

 

11. X seats have been reserved in your honour. Please let us know if you’re able to attend. (On the RSVP card)

 

12. Due to limited numbers we hope you appreciate that children are only invited if named on the invitation

 

13. Regrettably, our chosen venue is unable to accommodate children

 

14. Although we love your little ones, this is an adult-only affair. Thank you for your understanding.

 

15. Unfortunately, as much as we'd like to invite all our friends' children, it is only possible to accommodate children of close family. We hope that you will understand this decision and we very much hope you will still be able to join us on our special day.

 

16. To give all our guests the opportunity to let their hair down, without the worry of little eyes and ears, we respectfully request no children at the wedding or reception.

 

17. Although we love your little cherubs, we kindly request that our wedding remains adults only. So, book a sitter and dust off those dancing shoes!

 

18. Due to budget/space limitations, we are unable to extend the invitation to children.

 

19. We hope you understand that we can invite children of immediate family only. This is due to necessity rather than choice.